This Week

OK, so yes it's ONLY Thursday but lately (as Chris Hayes says) every day feels like 20. And this has been a long week.

I celebrated my birthday last week and by Sunday I was starting to feel 'off.' Pretty sure it was my body's way of telling me I had been overdoing things.

Sunday night I took my sleeping pill like a good little fibro patient and I SLEPT FOR SHIT. You ever have one of those night where you think you're sleeping but your brain is on FULL OVERDRIVE and therefore you're really not asleep? (Sorry. That's the only way I can describe it).

That was Sunday night.

Monday morning I was in a fog.
I actually told my parents and sister at lunch that I was feeling "fuzzy."
My brain felt like it was full of buzzing bees.
Sounds pleasant right?
I managed to make it through the whole day without failing too hard.

That night I took TWO sleeping pills.
Don't worry, my rheumatologist says that's OK.
Holy shit was that some good sleep.

I made it through Tuesday without much effort.
I actually felt OK.

Tuesday night I took two pills again.
More good sleep.

Yesterday I was irritable and cranky.
I blame PMS + Fibro.
It makes me super bitchy.
I took a 90 minute nap. 

Wednesday night was not good.
Our dog crapped in our bedroom at 11 p.m.
I cannot handle smells like that (even before fibro I couldn't do it but now it's like a trillion times worse).
So...I "slept" on the couch.
In pain.

Today I struggled to stay focused on stuff.
I managed to keep my focus, barely.
But as the day went on I could feel it.

The aches and pains creeping into my hips, elbows, shoulders, back, and the tip of my left index finger. Yes, really. The tip of my left index finger hurts. A lot.

I'm doing my best to fight it right now but I think tomorrow might be a not-so-great day.
Here's hoping I'm wrong.

And that my friends has been this week in Fibroland. 


Nevertheless, She Persisted

Oh Mitch McConnell. You weak, spineless, sniveling, man-child. You just cannot tolerate a woman in power. An intelligent, well-spoken, respected, outspoken woman in a position of power makes you feel week and inferior, doesn't she?

That's why last night you "warned" Senator Elizabeth Warren about the words she was speaking. And yet she persisted to speak. And you couldn't have that because HOW DARE SHE cross YOU. I mean, you're the guy in charge, right? How dare a woman speak her mind. That is unheard of.

And so ...

You mansplained it to her. You warned her.
And she persisted.


You see, I worked for men like you before. Weak, threatened by women who speak their mind (hell, men like you are threatened by women in every aspect of life). Men like you are the reason women still make less than men in the workforce. You're the reason we're STILL fighting for control over OUR OWN BODIES. You're the reason women are often treated as less than.

You are a weak, small-minded, sexist, mysognistic man-child. You wish women still stayed at home. But instead you're surrounded by intelligent, well-spoken, and outspoken women in Congress. And they aren't afraid of you. They know you're weak and malevolent and immature.

So you might have thought last night that you showed Elizabeth Warren who was "boss." You might have thought you put her in her rightful place.

But you're so wrong.

All you did was embolden a whole lot of strong, outspoken, intelligent women to stand up, speak out, and resist. Hell, we're even using your bullshit line ... "she was warned. she was given an explanation. nevertheless she persisted" - as a call to arms. We're posting it on our FB profiles. We're tweeting about it. We're hastagging the shit out of it. Oh, and as of right now about 8.5 MILLION people have watched that Facebook live video of Sen. Warren reading Coretta Scott King's letter.

Bet you weren't prepared for that, were you?
Of course you weren't.
You thought she (and we) would go silently into the night.

You were so wrong.

Also, I'm pretty sure "nevertheless, she persisted" WILL be part of Sen. Warren's 2020 presidential bid. So thanks for the tagline.

Now go crawl back into the hole from which you emerged you sexist, neanderthal pig.


Basketball Diaries, Chapter 2

Because it's what I do, I posted on Facebook about yesterday's basketball game.

My post: "The point of recreation league basketball at the 4th grade level should be to have FUN. But when your kid ends the game in tears because a player from the opposing team shoved her to the ground .... it's not fun. Also, every team should be held to the same standards and rules [and there should also be a SET of rules to follow] otherwise what's the point? These girls on the other teams aren't learning the game, they're only being taught to win no matter the cost. I have a problem with that."

I had several responses that were supportive but something someone said left me scratching my head.

In response to a comment from a parent I said: "It just drives me crazy that these coaches are teaching the girls to be mean - like why is that a requirement for basketball? The screaming in other player's faces blows my mind. I mean, I know basketball can be rough but there's "playing hard" and then there's just playing stupid." 

And this was the response in part: "They have taught our girls to do that [scream in other player's faces] to distract. It's just a tactic most teams use."


Coaches are teaching players to SCREAM IN THEIR OPPONENT'S FACES as a distraction tactic? WTAF. 

This is not OK in any way. 
Do you see college players doing this? Do you see professional players doing this? 
Since when did it become acceptable to scream in another person's face to "distract" them? 

Another friend offered these gems: "A lot of parents and coaches are trying to re-live their youth through their kids. Shameful." ... and "Lord help our society. And now we have a terrible example in the white house. Ugh."

I just have to wonder when ti became OK to essentially teach our kids to bully other players on the court or the field. I get that there's smack talk in any sport but screaming in someone's face seems so .... pathetic.

If your players aren't capable of learning the proper rules of a game and playing defense (or offense) in the proper way perhaps they are better suited to something else. And if the "coaches" can't manage to teach their teams how to play by the rules then perhaps they need to do something else too. 

I'm trying to teach my kids to play by the rules and respect the game and other players. Emma plays hard on the court but she would never scream in another player's face just to "distract" them. That's just unacceptable behavior. 


Basketball Diaries

Emma plays basketball for the local "recreational" league. See, our school district has no sports teams until 7th grade so all the kids in the district have to play for this league (or some other league).

On the league's website they state: "Our programs focus on the enjoyment of playing basketball in an organized setting, as well as fundamental training through the drills necessary to properly develop."

I call bullshit on this. 

We've been part of this program since Liv was in 4th grade and every year it gets worse. There is no "enjoyment" when it comes to the weekly games.

The majority of the coaches in this league - let's remember that this year I'm talking about FOURTH GRADE GIRLS - are only in it to win it. At any cost. 

The team we played today were rude, crass, and super physical. Like throwing elbows to the throat and shoving players to the ground. Which, in a normal game with REAL refs might actually be called as fouls. But not in today's game. 

Nope. Today the "ref" (I use that term really lightly) didn't call one single foul.

Now let's think about this for a sec. In basketball fouls are called on players for specific violations. It's a common and accepted part of the game. But in this league in grades K-4 fouls are only called IF the ref decides he feels like calling them. And then when the players get to 5th grade fouls MUST be called. But by this point the kids don't know why they are getting fouls called on behavior that was ACCEPTED SINCE KINDERGARTEN. 

See? Zero consistency. 

Oh and let's talk about the coaches. Last week we had the meathead who kept screaming "get your man!" to a group of 4th grade GIRLS. (And NO. I don't give two hoots that it's called man-on-man play. They're girls. Call them girls). This week? Oh, we had a real peach as the opposing team's coach - she was cheering as her girls threw elbows to the throats and SCREAMED in our player's faces. 

Being unable to control myself I actually yelled toward her (not at her...just in her general direction) "Seriously?!?" as the girls screamed in our players' faces, and she decided to yell at me "Stay on your side!" and something else that I can't recall. I'm pretty sure I responded in kind. I don't tolerate grownups mouthing off at me. 

At the end of the game a player on the opposing team shoved Emma to the ground so hard that she ended up in tears. This is not normal for Emma to cry in a game so I know it hurt. And....no whistle, no foul, no nothing.

Everything about this "league" is laughable from the management to the coaching to the "refs." I'm pretty sure this will be the last year we play in this "league." 

If their goal is to teach these kids the rules and regulations of the game they are failing in a spectacular manner.


Farewell January

I've said this before and I'll keep saying it.
If it wasn't for the fact that BOTH OF MY KIDS were born in January I would despise this month.

But as it is, there are two really great days in January.
So I give the LONGEST MONTH EVER a pass.
For the most part.

However, this January has been a real bear (except for those two days).
The month has dragged on FOREVER.
Like for reals.
I thought it would never end.

I blame January 20 for the shit factor this month.
I mean, if we're being totally honest here, that day sucked.
A lot.

And it hasn't gotten better since.
In fact, it's getting worse every damn day.

I'm literally waiting for the day when we're all assigned districts a la The Hunger Games.
I just have one request - please give us Finnick Odair.

Seriously though.
I think we're past the whole 'waiting for the other shoe to drop' part of this shit show.
Now we're just waiting for the impeachment.
I'll be popping popcorn for that. ;-)

So goodbye January.
Don't let the door hit you on the ass on your way out.

Also: #Resist


Resistance is NOT Ridiculous

For less than a week (OMG it seems SO MUCH FUCKING LONGER THAN THAT) I've been listening to the new "administration" spew bullshit and lies and half truths and alternative facts.

I've also been watching good, honest people stand up and resist. I know many people who didn't watch the inauguration last Friday (and oh how I wish I had missed it too). I know others who marched in one of the many Women's Marches last weekend (again, wishing I would have marched). And every day I see people posting their thoughts, opinions, and FEARS on social media.

At the same time I am watching and listening as those who support/like/trust the new president and his gang of old white men talk about how stupid we are for protesting. Talking about how we need to accept what has happened and move one and suck it up. How we should blindly follow the president and his merry band of assholes because HE'S OUR PRESIDENT TOO.

Today I saw someone post on Facebook - in response to the story of people hanging a "resist" banner from a crane in D.C. - "Enough people. You look so dumb."

And that was enough for me.

For the last six (seriously? IT'S ONLY BEEN SIX DAYS???) days I've felt this anger bubbling up. Hell, it even has my fibro all flared up I'm so angry and pissed off.

I have never - in all my almost 44 years of life - seen this country in such a fucked up state as it is in right now. I have never seen or heard so many adults with such worry and anger in their voice - at the same time, mind you.

Don't you DARE tell me to stop fighting or stop resisting or stop posting anti-Trump messages on my Facebook page or my Twitter account or my blog (not that anyone has ... YET .. but now you've been warned).

You want to know why I'm scared and pissed off? Because this president seems hell-bent on destroying the TRUTH with his bullshit "alternative facts" narrative. Because he doesn't seem to comprehend the First Amendment and all that is built upon those rights. Because he wants to destroy a woman's right to choose what is best for HER BODY. Because he wants to take health care away from 20 million Americans. Because he is leading us down a path that I never thought we could go down.

I've heard people say that it shouldn't be personal.
Guess what? It IS personal.

If the ACA is revoked and people can once again be denied health insurance because of pre-existing conditions that means that Olivia could potentially be denied health insurance at some point in her life. It means that if I ever have to get insurance on my own I could be denied. If the ACA is revoked I will lose my free birth control (and YES I can afford to pay for it, but the government shouldn't get to dictate that).

I could go on and on.

But instead I'll say this: How dare YOU think that you can tell anyone that they look "dumb" fighting for what they believe is right and just. How dare you think you have the right to tell us to "suck it up" and "deal with it." Because nothing he does will ever be OK or normal. We are not living in normal times and I fear that it will get worse before it gets better.

There's a reason George Orwell's 1984 is back on the best seller list.

I will continue to resist and fight and speak my mind. And if anyone doesn't like it you can (1) unfollow me on Facebook, (2) unfriend me on Facebook, (3) unfollow this blog, and (4) unfollow my Twitter account.


January 20

Today was not a happy day.

It felt a lot like the day after Election Day.
But much worse.

I cried when I watched President Obama walk out of the White House for the last time as Commander-in-Chief. (At the same time I was yelling at He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named to button his damn suit jacket. Seriously.)

I did my best to NOT watch the shitshow inauguration but I did see him take the oath of office. I walked away when he started to talk.

From what I'm seeing online his speech was basically red meat for his "followers" and was full of cynicism, one-liners, and bullshit. Pretty much what I expected it would be.

My Timehop from 8 years ago today was filled with memories like this: "so freaking excited about today! YAY Prez Obama!", and "Oh my gosh. Look @ that crowd!", and "is thrilled to be witnessing history.", and "is so happy!", and finally "amazing speech." (Another favorite was "bye bye George.").

Today I am not happy.
I'm unsettled.
And angry.
And worried.

I think we're all in for a very bumpy ride.


Teddy ... Otherwise Known as 'Worry Cat'

As I mentioned earlier today - the world could possibly end tomorrow.

More likely though is the sad reality that we're stuck with a reality show con man for president for the next four years.

Which leaves the majority of us (you know, the popular vote that went to Hillary) feeling a lot of unease, dread, sadness, and angst.

Teddy's face sums it up best:

Oh, Teddy. I like to call him "Worry Cat" because that look right there - the one with the sad, worried eyes - that's his normal face.

And so, I think Teddy will become our mascot for the next four years. Hell, he might even get his own blog (thanks for the suggestion Melissa!). He can wear the look of worry and unease for all of us.

Thursday Thoughts

A few random thoughts on a Thursday....

So...tomorrow is basically the end of the world as we know it.
Are you going to watch the ringmaster take the oath of office?
I'm not.
I'll be working. And trying to avoid social media for a while.
And maybe day drinking.

Anyway...today is one of 'those' days - I feel like the week is catching up with me.
I've been waking up every night in a lot of pain.
And I've been fighting brain fog all week.
Today might be the day where it all catches up with me.

I'm all tingly from head to toe (not in a good way).
My shoulders ache. My elbows hurt to touch.
Oh and I have the concentration of a gnat right now.
It is taking all my energy to actually write semi-coherent sentences.

I think I need a nap.
Or a vacation.
Or both.
A nap on a beach.
That would be idea.

Enough blathering on and on.
I better get some work done before the fog takes over.


Love Trumps Hate

Back in November, after the election was over and I was feeling rather distraught and angry, I decided to hang a sign in my office window. It was a sign that we picked up at the Hillary Clinton office here in town and I decided I would leave it up for as long as was necessary (at least four year at this point, right?)

So now it's January and I don't often think about the sign, except when I happen to drive by my house and see it. I also never gave much thought to whether or not anyone else saw the sign.


Today I received a note in the mail.
It was from a person I've never met.

The note read:

Traci - 
We've never met before - unless we have passed each other on Halloween, but I live in your neighborhood and drive past your house daily. I wanted to Thank You for your sign in your window. When the days are horrific and I read again and again of the awful things happening in our current governmental leadership, the racism and hate crimes and just the uphill battle of it all, your window makes me smile. It lets me know that you are there and we have an ally close by. Thank you for your presence. 

Always stronger together,
(there was a name but I'm not publishing the name)

You guys.
I was standing in my kitchen crying after I read this.
To know that someone saw this sign and feels better and safer because of it?
All the feels. 

After watching the slightly terrifying (OK, really terrifying) "press conference" from He Who Shall Not Be Named (on this blog) and feeling very angry and defeated it was amazing to read something like this from a complete stranger.

Because honestly, we're going to need to meet those strangers and become friends and allies in person and fight the good fight. Stronger together is the ONLY way we're going to get through the next four years.

Love trumps hate.
Never forget that.


Happy New Year!

Yes, I realize that today is the SECOND day of 2017, but I was busy yesterday.
Doing nothing. ;)
So Happy New Year today.

I've been seriously neglecting this blog (and my allergy blog too) so I'm going to try my best to actually BLOG about life this year.

I'm not making a resolution because I don't do that.
I'm simply stating that I have a lot to say (and I'm sure after the world goes to shit on January 20 I'll have more to say..provided we're all still here).

And this blog is the perfect vessel for all that I have to say.

Also, I've been blogging since....2005 (!!!)... so it's too late to quit now. ;-)

As it is in the next four weeks the Tweeter-in-Chief is going to be sworn in (God help us all), my oldest turns 13, and my youngest turns 10.

Also happening this year: my husband turns 50, we celebrate our 15th wedding anniversary, and I'll be 44.

Yeah. I just realized that last part.
I forgot I was going to be 44.

So yeah.
I think I'll have a lot to blog about this year.

And, if you don't like swearing or sarcasm or politics ... you should probably remove this blog from your bookmarks because I predict there will be A LOT of that happening this year.

Happy 2017.
May the odds be ever in OUR favor.