A true story about ER visits, poop and Twitter

Friday night started out like any other night at our house - you know, thunderstorms and the kids sleeping on the couches in the living room. Just a typical Friday night in T-town.

Once the storms settled down, we tried to put the girls back in their own beds. Olivia - who never woke up during the storms - was an easy 'put down.' Emma...not so much.

Around 10 p.m., Emma started complaining that her belly hurt. We thought at first that maybe she was hungry, because she often says 'my tummy hurts' when she wants to eat. So, we tried some applesauce. And then some graham crackers. She didn't want anything.

We tried to get her to sleep - but every time she would fall asleep she would wake up 10 minutes later, screaming and crying 'my belly hurts!'

At about midnight we decided to call the on-call nurse. We told her the symptoms and she said it might be appendicitis. She wanted us to make Emma jump up and down (one of the tests for appendicitis, apparently). Emma refused.

The nurse said she would recommend we take Emma to the ER because based "it's better to be safe than sorry."

Oh man.

And so at 2 a.m. Kevin strapped a crying and screaming Emma into the carseat and headed to the emergency room.

I stayed at home with Olivia (who was sound asleep and had no clue what was going on).

Unable to sleep and totally freaking out, I signed on to Twitter.

I was hoping that maybe one or two people I knew would be online so I could talk and not go crazy with worry at home alone. (It wasn't like I could call anyone either -- calling people at 2 a.m. for an ER visit and no diagnosis is not a great idea - all you do is (1) wake up your family members and (2) freak them out so they can't get back to sleep).

So, I tweeted out at 2:14 a.m. - well, DH is taking DD3 to the ER. she is crying and in pain and we don't know why. on call doc hasn't called us back.

I didn't know if anyone was 'listening' but soon enough, I was getting tweets sent back to me from several of my Twitter friends. I am so thankful for the words tweeted out to me that night. I had people asking my questions about Emma's pain and her temperature. They were sending out words of care and concern and it was all appreciated.

For about an hour I tweeted back and forth with the following people: @Lynne_from_Texa, @DisneyAlli, @discollegeblog, @IAmPumpkinQueen, @5minutesformom, @DisneyWorlds.

And to all of you, I want to say this: Thank you.

I had a place to go in the middle of the night when I was freaking out and didn't want to wake anyone up with a phone call that said "I don't know what is going on"...and my people were out there for me. I was able to say "I'm going a bit crazy and I'm here all alone and will anyone listen" and you listened.

And for that I am very grateful.

After about an hour, I was calm enough by 3:45 a.m. that I was able to go to bed for a short time, and then I woke up in a total panic because Kevin hadn't called.

Of course, I started panicking. WHY hadn't he called? What was going on? I paced the house for a few minutes and then, at 5:45 a.m. I called Kevin and he told me that Emma didn't have appendicitis (no, she was just constipated*....of course, because it's always about the poop, right?) and they were driving down our street, coming home.

I tweeted out the good news that she was home and healthy (and just needed to have a good poop, really)...and I would like to thank everyone who took a minute to say "so happy to hear that Emma was OK." You have no idea how much those tweets of 140 characters or less mean to me.

Yes, this time (thankfully!) the "emergency" wasn't anything more than a lot of poop ... but I think it's fair to say that if it had been something more serious, my Twitter community would have been there for me - and it's nice to know that there is an outlet for my anxiety in the middle of the night.

You might not 'get' it, but after 11,359 tweets, I can honestly say that I still love Twitter.
And to my 511 followers I say this - thank you for being there.


*(We determined that Emma was 'holding it in' for fear of going potty in her PullUp -- yet another issue with the on-going potty training drama in my house!)

Itchy and scratchy

I am miserable.

There you go.
I put it out there just so you know what is coming in this post.

Oh, the bronchitis is gone..so I am no longer coughing and wheezing like a two-pack-a-day smoker.

But I am still miserable.

It's called dry skin.

I am used to dry skin in the winter - it is part of living in the north and dealing with constant freezing temps and dry air and well, it sucks. But this year...it's been different.

I actually had to go to the doctor's today because I'm THAT miserable thanks to itchy, dry skin.

(Sorry if this is TMI...but you can stop reading...).

I have tried everything - I have a smorgasbord of lotions in my bathroom right now (seriously, I've bought FIVE different brands in the past three weeks) and NOTHING has worked. I have been taking over the counter allergy medicine, slathering lotion on my arms like 10 times a day and I am still miserable.

Of course, being the cynic that I am, I have spent that past few days searching WebMD for causes of 'rash on arms' and 'skin conditions' - I figured it was going to be something terrible.

I mean, why else would I be waking up in the middle of the night to SCRATCH MY ARMS????

But no.
I did it to myself.
I caused my own misery.

My skin was SO DRY and I scratched my arms SO MUCH (because, you know, I am 5 years old and don't know any better), that I am now on STEROIDS. And had to buy a $40 bottle of lotion that is supposed to make me better.

Yes, you did read that right.
$40 for a bottle of lotion.
Are you freaking kidding me?
Is it made with the horn of a unicorn?
It damn well better work, that's all I'm saying.

So, I will probably be cranky and irritable thanks to the steroids, but if they work and if the lotion works and if I feel better in a week, I guess it will be worth it.

*Update: 3/12/10 - So far I have taken 7 steroid pills (don't ask...I had to take SIX yesterday) and have used the 'infused with unicorn horn and 24K gold'** lotion once and oh my gosh, I might be less scratchy. Already. I actually felt rested when I woke up this morning. Hmmmm.

**Of course, I'm kidding. No unicorns were harmed in the making of the lotion.

I am sick of ______________

Go ahead, fill in the blanks. After this long, cold winter you MUST be sick of something.

I'm sick of being sick.

I'm sick of winter.

I'm sick of unemployment and the stupidity that seems to flow out of that government entity.

I'll apologize right now, I'm not going to be all chipper in this post.

Because I am sick.

I have bronchitis. Again. I haven't been sick since last June, but I started feeling those tell-tale signs of bronchitis late last week. And by Saturday I was coughing and wheezing and generally feeling like, well, crap.

I finally went to the doctor yesterday (because you know, if you get sick on the weekend you can't see a doctor). You know what irks me about going to the doctor when it's a 'sick call'?

They insist on weighing you. I mean, c'mon. Really? Why do you need to weigh me? I have bronchitis. I don't need to be weighed. And then for some unknown reason they also measured my height yesterday. Um, yeah. I'm 37 years old. I haven't grown (vertically) since I was probably 15 years old. I'm quite certain the height in my chart has not changed in years.

I just wanted antibiotics, so let's skip the height and weight check and get on with it.

I blame my bronchitis on the groundhog.

I decided on February 2nd that if he's going to give us six more weeks of winter, I will blame all resulting illnesses on him.

Stupid rodent.

And I won't even get into the whole unemployment thing. Suffice it to say that they need to hire people who (1) know what they're doing, (2) give you the right answers when you call, and (3) actually HELP you. If you can't do those few simple things then maybe you should find a job somewhere else - be useless elsewhere.

OK. I'm sorry.
I'm ranting.
And being grouchy.
That happens when I spend hours in the middle of the night coughing and hacking.

I'll go rest now.

And the hits just keep on coming....

So, the weekend started off on a not-so-stellar note (see previous post).

I had hope for a better weekend yesterday morning.

It didn't happen.

My weekend in a nutshell:

Friday - Husband's company cuts everyone's salary by 10%
Saturday - Only high point was seeing 'Twilight' again w/ my sister and one of her friends. It was all downhill after that.
Saturday night - my 81 year old grandmother is taken to the hospital and has emergency surgery to remove her large intestine and part of her small intestine. The docs tell my mom that grandma might not make it thru the surgery. She pulls through but now has months of rehab in her immediate future. She's still in ICU, but might get moved to another room on Monday.
Later Saturday night - my husband says he's feeling sick to his stomach. Oh wonderful.
Sunday morning, 6 am - husband IS sick. I send him upstairs, away from me and the girls.
Sunday afternoon, 4 pm - Olivia gets sick. It's now 8:30 p.m. as I post this, and she cannot keep anything, even liquids, in her stomach. I'm hoping this passes soon. Husband seems to be better.

And so that leaves me and Emma. I have intentionally not eaten a thing today - hoping that maybe if I have nothing in my system, there won't be anything to, well, uh...you know. Emma has been OK all day...running around, happy, eating small meals. She's asleep right now, but I am fully expecting a vomiting 2 year old by the middle of the night.

Thankfully, I don't work tomorrow. As things are going now, I expect that I will be home alone, caring for 2 sick kids and myself. Really looking forward to that.

Today I am grateful for:
1. The surgeon who operated on grandma
2. My sister's friend for taking us to Twilight for free
3. The fact that I have not yet thrown up
4. The fact that Emma is still doing OK too
5. The hope that this stomach bug is a 24 hour thing and will soon vacate the premises of my home

Sick of being sick

I had bronchitis twice in the month of July. August sailed by without as much as a sniffle. And now, on the 2nd day of September, I am sick again. I think it's bronchitis...but won't know for certain until after my doctor appointment this afternoon.

And to top off my day...Olivia has pneumonia. She's 4 1/2 and has pneumonia. Unreal. She had a fever for most of the weekend - Saturday night, Sunday night, all day yesterday. But she said nothing hurt. Until this morning.

This morning she said her shoulder hurt when she touched it. I thought that was odd, so I told my husband to mention it to the doctor today. Apparently, that's a sign of pneumonia in kids. Who knew.

Course of treatment for Olivia: rest and antibiotics.

I am hoping that Emma can avoid this plauge that seems to never really go away. She just had tubes put in her ears last week and the last thing she needs is bronchitis or pneumonia.

I hate sickness. It sucks.

UPDATE: I have bronchitis. Again. You have just got to be FREAKING KIDDING ME.

The Return of The Cough

It's back.

My bronchitis, that is.

I'm feeling not so great again.

Coughing like a pack-a-day smoker again.

On antibiotics again.

Damn.

Again.

Diagnosis

I have bronchitis.

Yeah. Bronchitis.

Damn.

I had to get a breathing treatment at the doctor's. And I have a prescription for an antibiotic and an inhaler.

Have I mentioned how much I DETEST being sick?

Freakin' bronchitis.

The sick house

I'm still sick. I stayed home from work today - which is very RARE for me. But that's how crappy I feel. I was awake half of the night coughing - and it's one of those painful, chest rattling coughs.

And then once I did fall asleep, Emma woke me up at 4 am.

With a 102.8 degree fever.

Diagnosis: yet another ear infection. The pediatrician says it's time for tubes in the ears. So, next week we have our consult with the ENT doctor.

Me? Well, I'm going to the doctor today at 3:30....I am leaning toward bronchitis for my diagnosis...but what do I know? My doctorate is in law, not medicine.

Oh, and to top it all off...Olivia threw up this morning. But she's fine now. I think it was a side effect of some minor heartburn. She gets that every now and then.

Yeah, it's been a banner day here.

Part 3....

Well, the Universe didn't listen. I've been sick since last night.

I'm miserable.

Emma has been to the doctor's twice in 2 days.

Olivia is feeling better. I think.

Kevin is likely on the mend too.

As an aside..."Friday's Feast" will be a day late. :)

Back to the couch.

And now....Part 2 of The Hits Just Keep on Coming...

Update as of 8:21 p.m. EST:

- Olivia is now sick.

- As is Kevin.

- That leaves me. I am making deals with the Universe right now, begging to not get sick.

On the upside...it appears that this might only be a 24 hour illness for most people.

I f**king hate winter. And stomach viruses.

So, does this mean I'm a kid at heart?

I've been sick for more than a week. It started out with a headache lasting 5 days, which I thought was because I was getting a sinus infection. So, my doctor put me on amoxocillin. Which caused me to break out into hives on Sunday. So then they put me on a 5-day "Z pack" of antibiotics.

Yesterday, my hands swelled up and this morning I woke up with serious joint pain in my hands, wrists, knees and ankles.

The diagnosis: Fifth Disease.

It's a common ailment in kids ages 5 to 15. [Yeah, I'm 35 - hardly a "kid"]. When kids get it, they have cold symptoms and a rash on their face, arms, etc. [It's also called "Slapface"]. When older kids and adults get it, they can suffer from joint pain. [From the Web: In some cases, especially in adults and older teens, an attack of fifth disease may be followed by joint swelling or pain, often in the hands, wrists, knees, or ankles.]

So, basically the hives last weekend could have been a rash associated with this thing. And the joint pain? Horrible. I feel like an 85 year old woman with arthritis. I can't even wear my wedding ring because my hands and finger joints are too swollen. My doc gave me Darvoset...so I can pass out and be totally useless, I guess. There is nothing to take to "cure" this ... it's a virus that must run its course. Doc said "get rest, take Advil."

The only good thing? Once you get it, you can't get it again. Ever.

Another reason to NOT kick your fireplace hearth

Yeah, if you needed just one reason to NOT kick your fireplace, I've got one.

It's called a broken little toe.

My little toe on my right foot, to be exact.

How does one kick one's fireplace hearth? By accident, I'll assure you. I was walking past it and it's stone and some of the stones stick out more than others and BAM! before I knew it, I had slammed right into the darn thing.

Searing pain. Made me cry it hurt so bad.

And now, the toe is broken. At least I'm assuming it is. It's swollen, bruised and won't bend. Oh, and did I mention the pain when I walk or wear shoes or press on the gas pedal in my car?

If it continues this way, I might have to call my foot doctor...but I don't think there is any "cure" for a broken toe.

Sometimes, my lack of grace and finesse astounds me.

Just in case you were wondering...

...how much it would cost to have a pair of toy shoes removed from your nasal passages, I have the answer.

$5,200.

We received the bill today from Olivia's, uh, "procedure" when she stuck a pair of Polly Pocket shoes up her nose. Yeah, you read that right. It says $5,200.

The removal of the shoes was approximately $4400. I'm guessing that was for the 10 minutes of laughing gas they used to "gently" put her under and the use of the "procedure room".

My favorite part of the bill was the $795 charged for the recovery room. Why? Because she was in the room for all of 10 minutes and they gave her a sippy cup of WATER! Apparently, it was damn good water. Good thing she didn't ask for apple juice.

Thankfully, we met our deductibles this year (thanks to my hospital stay giving birth to Emma), so we only have to pay a small amount of the bill (about $150). I cannot imagine NOT having health insurance.

The healthcare system in this country has a nice little scam going, that's for certain. I really want to see a detailed bill for this procedure. I think it would be VERY interesting.

Well, if the shoe fits....

....why not stick the pair up your nose?

Olivia and I are home from her mini-hospital trip. She was such a trooper...didn't even cry when they took her to the operating room.

We all thought she had just one shoe up her nose, but it turns out she had put a pair of shoes up there. The doc gave them to me in a nice little jar -- two little pink "Polly Pocket" Snow White shoes.

Only my kid would have to do it up that big. One shoe wasn't enough. Nope, it had to be two.

On the way home from the hospital Olivia says to me: "Mama, my nose is all better now."

Yes it is.

So much for me winning "Mother of the Year"

Today was yet another day of adventure with Olivia.

In typical 3-year-old fashion, she decided it was high time to stick a small toy up her nose.

A small toy shoe to be exact. Like a Barbie doll shoe, but smaller.

"OOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!" was all I heard. Then Olivia comes running into the master bath pointing at her nose.

So, I looked inside. Yep. There it was. A small, plastic shoe.

Called the pediatrician's office. The nurse actually laughed at me. "We get this all the time," she assures me. Uh-huh.

The pediatrician tried twice to get the shoe out. Olivia would have nothing to do with that. She screamed and howled (yes, she really howled). The doctor quickly gave up.

And sent us on our merry way to the Ear, Nose and Throat "specialist."

He was little to no help either. Olivia was still freaked out from the experience at the pediatrician's office, so she wouldn't let the ENT doc get near her nose.

And so, we are now scheduled to be in an operating room at 7:15 tomorrow morning. They are going to put Olivia under a general anesthesia and get the shoe out.

I'm hoping she sneezes really hard between now and then and it shoots out of her nose.

I'm back!!!!!!!

Wow...I've been a total slacker on this blog for the past few weeks. So very sorry. But as most of you know, I've been dealing with ungodly morning sickness. I am just now coming out of the fog that was the month of June. Had an ultrasound yesterday....doctor thought I was bigger than I should be for where she had me. And she was right. I'm actually 10 weeks, 6 days (a week ahead of where they had me). Official due date is now February 1st, but with the scheduled c-section, it'll be the middle of January when we welcome baby.

So, that's why I haven't been blogging. The little "Bean" has been wreaking havoc on me. :)

In other news, I'm back in the Writer's Workshop after a 2-week hiatus due to several things. My column this week is on friendship. Check it out at the Toledo Free Press.

Now I gotta go eat....Bean is hungry. :)

They're baaaaack!!!!!!!!!!!

Two things returned to me yesterday.

First, the ducks (Tony and Carmella Soprano) came back. So, at least they had not been whacked by rival ducks, as I had feared. I think they just took a mini-vacation.

Second, I have streph throat. Again. This is the second time since late March. Last time it took two rounds of anitbiotics to zap it. This time around, I think I caught it in time and one Z-Pack will do it. I hope. I don't have time to be sick. Nor, do I have time to get my tonsils out - as several people have suggested I might need to do.

Lucky for me, it's going to be nice outside for the next few days so I can convalesce outside in the sunshine.

Ah-Ah-AHCHOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!

Let's see.....

Itchy, watery eyes? CHECK!
Runny nose? CHECK!
Scratchy throat? CHECK!
Cough? CHECK!
Splitting headache every afternoon? CHECK!

Ah-Choo! Yeah, I hate springtime.

It's allergy season, yet again. And, once again I'm suffering.

It all started when I was 4 years old. I found out that I was allergic to just about everything, except penicillin. Grass, dust, mold, cats, dogs, birds, trees, ragweed...you name it, I was allergic to it. I had allergy shots for YEARS - until I was about 18, I think. Then the docs said "you're cured." Well, I wasn't "cured" - my allergies came back worse than ever the next year, and I should've sued them for malpractice. (Ah, there's that wanna-be lawyer in me coming out!).

I have taken every kind of allergy medicine out there, and while most of it has worked some of the time, none of it works all the time.

And I can't get any prescription allergy medicine because my wonderful health insurance doesn't cover it. (OK, so I could get it, but I'd have to pay full price for it which is just stupid. All because some insurance company bean-counter-hack decided it's not in the best interest of the insurance company to cover Rx allergy meds. Yeah, to hell with what's good for the patient, as long as the company's bottom line is healthy).

Anyway, I digress...

I was saying, I hate springtime. Sure, everything is blooming and turning green and pollinating. I swear today a stiff breeze blew thru my neighborhood and I saw a huge cloud of pollen come off a tree in my yard and it headed right for my house. It was like watching a cloud of toxic fumes coming my way. The sneezing and wheezing quickly followed.

And now a few of my neighbors have the audacity to mow their lawns. Don't the know that I'm suffering here? I hate the smell of freshly mowed lawn. It makes me miserable.

That being said, I'm going to go take some Motrin and try to get rid of this killer allergy-induced migraine.

AH-CHOO!!

Bad patient

I'll be the first to admit it - I am a horrible sick person. I hate being sick. It annoys me, frustrates me and generally puts me in an all-around crappy mood.

So, imagine my sheer joy today when the doctor diagnosed me with strep throat.

I started feeling ill yesterday - but just thought it was a sore throat. I took some Motrin during the day and some Nyquil at night and figured I'd be better today. That is until I woke up this morning and could barely swallow. So, I made a trip to the doctor's office and walked out with the diagnosis above and an Rx for Penicillin.

Yea, fun.

I haven't been sick like this in quite a while. Sure, I've had the occassional cold or minor sore throat, but STREP??? C'mon...give me a break.

Kevin says I should get my tonsils removed. Yeah, that's a great idea...because I'm such a good patient. He must be joking -- or at least doesn't remember how miserable I was after my last surgery [the C-section for Olivia. Ok, a bit more serious, but still...]. Doctors, surgery and me -- not a good mix.

So, now I'm dosing up on Penicillin, 800 mgs of Motrin every 8 hours, apple juice and sugar-free Kool-Aid. It totally sucks. I've had oatmeal, scrambled eggs and ice cream today. Mmmm...Yeah, I'd rather be eating pizza or even a reuben with the left-over corned beef from yesterday.

As I said, I HATE being sick.

Well, off to get more Kool-Aid and take some more Motrin.