Yesterday was a very bad day, as bad days go while studying for the bar exam.
I took a "practice" multiple choice test -- 200 questions over the course of six (yes, 6) hours. Felt OK coming out of it -- which should have been the first sign that something was amiss. Whenever you feel "ok" or "good" coming out of any test that relates to law, it's a sign that something has gone terribly, terribly wrong.
Graded the test last night -- and while I won't give out a specific number, let's just say something did go terribly, terribly wrong. So, today I'm going to go thru the lecture notes to see where I screwed up.
Part of what I found last night was that I had put question marks next to what would turn out to be the right answer, yet I picked the wrong answer as my 'final answer.' So, basically I'm beating myself...the test isn't doing it, it's all me. [Sometimes I just wish that Regis was there saying "would you like to phone a friend or maybe use your 50/50?"]. Must remember to NOT second-guess my gut instinct.
Then to make matters not much better, I received a practice essay in the mail -- graded and full of comments. I did OK - 4 out of 7 points - but the best comments (and most useless) were these:
1. "nice handwriting"
2. "good use of space"
Are you f-ing kidding me???? Nice handwriting? Sorry pal, nice handwriting isn't going to help me pass the bar. How about "nice legal analysis" or "damn girl, you're a legal genius!" No, I get "nice handwriting and good use of space." Un-f'ing-believable.
Oh and then there was the complete and total meltdown last night. That was fun. I think that I was so exhausted (mentally) that I just cracked. That, and I'm fighting one nasty cold...so I also felt like total crap. I just sat on the couch and cried for about 15 minutes. I think Kevin was afraid I had gone over the edge completely. Thankfully, I felt much better, mentally at least, when I woke up this morning.
I'm there, too. I'm starting to go nuts. I just got over a bad cold too and I missed a week of studying. And T, I am doing the same thing too ... I always choose the wrong answer. I think I'm just going to start picking the one I don't think is right (after eliminating the two that are obviously wrong) and just going with it.
ReplyDeleteBut, yeah, I'm losing it. The stress is mounting and I am starting to have the nightmares. I freaking hate this crap.
Big hug.
T