Are YOU Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?

Today was one of THOSE days when I want to punch the people who came up with Common Core right in the throat.


Olivia is in fifth grade. She has 109% in math according to her mid-term grade card. She's sort of a math whiz kid.

Except when this happens:

I mean seriously.

I have two college degrees (journalism and law) and I can't figure it out. My husband has one college degree (bachelor of science in business). He spent MORE THAN AN HOUR with Olivia trying to figure out the answer.

We called my dad - a CPA with two college degrees. He was somewhat stumped and said he'll work on it and call us back. That was an hour ago.

I took to Facebook and asked for help. A friend sent her answer. Another friend said she used algebra to figure out the answer (which is great, except fifth graders don't use algebra - but damn, wouldn't that impress the teacher!?!).

Olivia thinks she found the right answer - and it was the same as my friend's so we have that going for us.

Then, there was this spelling homework:

Olivia is supposed to use FOUR of the "challenge words" to write about what it would be like if she went on a trip to study an unusual animal. Because, you know, words like "forfeit," "orchestra," and "hoard" really make me think ANIMALS.

It took every ounce of self control that I have to not be SNARKY and have Olivia write some totally off the wall sentences. Like: "I used to hoard cats when I was a child. But I had to forfeit them when animal control came to my house. So the fact that I get to visit Australia to study the platypus is a rarity. I sure hope I get to stop in Sydney and see the orchestra play."

I thought that might be a bit TOO much.

So we settled on this instead:

Suck it Common Core.
Suck. It.

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