This is how I feel right now....
So, life is a bit crazy lately.
The job is keeping me busy.
I feel stretched in a million different directions every night when I get home.
No, I'm not asking for sympathy.
I'm not complaining about having a job.
I'm just trying to figure out how in the hell I'm supposed to balance it all and not lose my mind.
I have this horrible sense of mommy guilt -- on Monday through Friday I literally see my kids for about 30 minutes in the morning before shipping them off to daycare for the entire day. And then I get home from work at 6 p.m., cook dinner, eat dinner, bathe the kids and then it's bedtime. (For them, not me.)
I miss them every day when I'm work. I try to not think about it too much - I know they are making friends at daycare and Olivia starts first grade in a month and that will be a whole new adventure for her.
However, I will admit, every single day I think how wonderful it would be if I could stay home with them.
But I can't.
I need to work.
Our family budget requires that I work.
And I KNOW that I am lucky to even have a job in this economy.
I just wish that I could clone myself at times so that one of me could work and earn a paycheck and the other me could stay home with the kids.
And yes, I know that I'm not the first mommy to feel this way.
I just needed to get this down on 'paper' and get it all out.
I know that I'm in a 'transition' period...adjusting to the new job and all the changes that come along with it.
I will figure it out.