The Good, the Bad, and the Crutches

So yesterday was my "three week follow up" at the ortho surgeon's office.

Good news: I can "ease off" the crutches. Which in my world means throw those bitches to the curb. I'm done trying to go "non-weight bearing." Buh-bye.

Other good news: I can drive again. As long as it doesn't hurt. Well, guess what? It freaking HURTS like a mother. But, I'm going to drive. Because I'm sick of being driven around like a 42-year-old Miss Daisy. I'll limit how much I drive.

Meh news: I'm stuck in this damn walking boot for another four weeks. Maybe six weeks. Maybe longer. Who knows.

Also, I have to do 4-6 weeks of physical therapy. I despise physical therapy. It hurts. It makes me miserable. But I'll do it.

Why?

Because my end goal is to walk around Walt Disney World Resort for a week in November without pain.

Seems like a good goal to me.

Grumpy

Yes, I'm grumpy.
I'm irritable.
I'm annoyed.

I've been on these stupid crutches and wearing this ridiculous walking boot since July 9. I will be stuck with them until July 30.

That is NINE MORE DAYS.

Nine more days of no driving. Of asking people to take me places. Of sending my husband to the grocery store.

Nine more days of being annoyed.

I have no idea if this whole walking-boot-crutches-non-weight-bearing nonsense is working. I'm still having pain in my ankle. It's not as swollen as it was, but it still hurts.

And NO. I'm not doing 100 percent non-weight bearing 100 percent of the time. Because I can't. I have to walk up the stairs without crutches. I have to stand in the shower on two feet. It is damn near impossible to NOT put weight on my foot at times.

Plus...have you seen me? There's no way I can NOT put weight on my foot. I mean, c'mon. I'm talented and all but damn I have CURVES. That isn't happening.

Also, I'm sick and tired of not being able to drive. I'm one of those annoying Type A independent I CAN DO THIS MYSELF!!! type of people. Which means when someone says "Oh, can I get you anything?" or "Let me know if you need help"....my response is going to be NO.

It's not that I don't appreciate the offers (I really do) ... it's just that I hate needing help. Like I really, really, really don't like it. At all.

I want to get in my car and run my own errands.
I want to go to the gym. (Never thought I'd say THAT...but I haven't been to the gym in TWO WEEKS and I actually miss working out. Which just makes me grumpier.)

And yes, I realize that I'm stubborn.
This is NOT a news flash.

So if you happen to see me or talk to me in the next nine days and I seem a bit a lot grumpy, don't take it personally.

I'm just in a bad mood.

Fell Off My Unicorn

Yes you read that right.

I fell off my unicorn.

Or at least that's what I'm going to tell people for the next TWO WEEKS when they ask why I'm on crutches.

I'm sick and tired of trying to explain why I'm on crutches.

This is why I'm "out of commission" right now: Four long years ago I was "training" for a 5K and I was also on antibiotics (ciproflaxin to be exact) ... and I partially ruptured my Achilles tendon. That injury didn't heal properly and it ended up causing Achilles tendonitis, plantar fasciitis, and post tibular tendonitis. Fast-foward to right here and now and my post tib tendonitis has been getting worse and worse over the last 3 years and now I'm to the point that if I can't get it "calmed down" I'm looking at a cast or possibly even reconstructive surgery.

Dear post tib tendon: Calm. The. F**K. Down. Please.

But honestly I can't ramble on for minutes telling people that lame ass story about partially ruptured tendons and never-ending tendonitis. It's boring. And it's stupid. And people just end up staring at me like "WTF is this crazy woman talking about?"

Which brings me to the unicorn.

I am now telling people that I'm on crutches and in a walking boot because I fell off my unicorn.

Like this:

Any questions?

So much for that 1/2 marathon...for now

Yes, in case you're wondering that IS my foot in the walking boot.

Here's the story behind the boot...

Last fall I signed up for my very first 5K. My initial plan was that I was going to RUN the 5K (despite the fact that I had not been "a runner" since I was in law school, about 15 years ago). I started "training" ... which was really just me walking 1.5 miles a few days a week. And then, at some point last October I started having excruciating pain in my right ankle. I stopped walking/training and thought "oh it'll go away."

It didn't go away.

Fast forward to the 5K in February. I didn't wrap the ankle, I "toughed it out" and by the end of that day I could barely walk. (But I still managed to limp my way through the Magic Kingdom that night!). As the months went by the pain would get worse and then better and then worse again. Every time I tried to start my walking routine again the pain would get worse. Ice, Motrin, wrapping the ankle ... nothing helped.

A few weeks ago I noticed there was a small lump on my Achilles tendon. So I Googled it. Because Google is where everyone goes for sound medical advice, right? Yeah, from what I could find on the Internet it seemed that I had an issue with my Achilles tendon - a possible tear, tendinitis, something. Then we went on vacation and a week of walking on the sand (and the pain that followed) convinced me that I needed to see my foot doctor.

Last Friday I had my appointment.

The diagnosis: a partially torn Achilles tendon and Achilles tendinitis.

The road to recovery consists of (1) wearing that God-awful boot when I'm at home, (2) wearing my running shoes WITH inserts when I'm going out, (3) three weeks of physical therapy, three times per week, and (4) pain medication.

After the PT, I have a follow up appointment to see how things are progressing. Apparently the goal is to stretch my Achilles tendon (which seems odd, since it's already torn) so that it doesn't tear completely. Because a full tear would be bad. Really bad. If the PT isn't doing the job, I could end up in a cast for a few weeks. Which would be awesome. In a totally not awesome way.

Guess I won't be training for that 1/2 marathon anytime soon. 

A word to wise dear readers, if you're in the midst of a new walking or running routine and you suddenly have terrible pain in your ankle, don't wait TEN MONTHS to visit the doctor.